Whats worth the prize, is always worth the fight.

Have you ever been on a rollercoaster ride, that you couldn't wait to get off of? I just went to Magic Mountain with my best friend Vickie, for her birthday. We had an amazing day, but there was a span of time, where we both weren't feeling good. I was hot, and extremely thirsty, and my stomache felt like it was doing flips. It was not a good feeling. We got on the batman ride, and immediately I felt sick...I didn't know if I was going to make it through that ride. I tried closing my eyes, but that made me even more nauseous. FINALLY, the ride skidded (more like slammed) to a stop. I made it, or so I thought. We sat in this black room for what seemed like forever before they finally let us off.

For the past two years, I have felt like I have been on a rollercoaster ride. So many ups and downs, and twists and turns, and loops. I have not posted much from my journal at all, but if you just took one little peek inside, you would be amazed at the rollercoaster my emotions have been on. One day, I am frustrated, the next completely encouraged. Its a mess.
Reading back through it, I am reminded of just how faithful my Lord is to me. He has never given me more than I could handle, even if it seemed like it at the time. I have been stretched to the point where I knew I was going to snap at any second, but I never did. My God, is amazing. No other way to put it.
I am elated to tell you, that once again, my best friend, has come through on my behalf. I am heading to Brazil. I will be leaving October 14th. It has been one crazy journey to this point, but I know that it will be worth it.

From the Journal of Janel..

Dear God,

I'm gonna write this like you don't already know. And thoughts that don't line up neatly might make a little more sense on this screen.

I know we don't talk much these days. You're mostly ignored, saved for some unguarded moments right before sleep. I've been busy dodging your calls and looking for hurdles to put in your path. But thoughts of you still slip in quietly, like when traffic surprisingly opens or gets out of my way. And you came back to mind in the middle of a movie today.

I don't have big reasons like war or the poor to stubbornly push you away. I didn't lose someone close to me, or blame you for any wrong doings in my life. If we all sat and counted our hardships mine wouldn't stack up that tall. And that says more than a little about how easy I find it to fall. I've just got me and my everyday problems, and they don't even hold up that well. So I don't understand why I don't boomerang back to your side. Even when my head's alright with the thought, my heart is just shrugging and not really up for the ride.

Most of the folks that I love in this world have you in common. And if not for your church then we'd never have met. So when they ask how I'm doing it feels like I'm betraying some confidence. I used to sing songs with my hands held up high, but these days it's like scheduling time for the dentist. For the life of me I can't find one good reason to have lost trust in you. But that's how it is, and I was hoping we could do something about that.

I miss the looking forward to you. With all these feelings of falling and changing, I miss the gravity of you.

Janel

What is Master's Commission?

Master's Commission is a training program created for young adults to provide a stimulating learning environment for developing personal disciplines, moral character and leadership qualities. Our training program is divided into three primary modules giving interns valuable real-time learning experiences.

Personal Development - Learning the basics of personal disciplines and practical life skills reflecting high moral character and ethical values. Interns have purposed to invest up to two years of their lives for hands-on leadership training where they realize the lasting values and benefits of hard work, integrity and self discipline.

Service to the Community - Practical services within the local community, including public schools, churches, social service agencies, shelters for the homeless, after-school programs, safe-houses for former street children, and orphanages.

Global Compassion - Compassion and service with a global focus. Through collaborative partnerships with local social projects and churches, our interns learn what goes on behind the scenes. Through on-site experiences, our interns develop a global perspective on relieving world needs.